Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

View previous topic View next topic Go down

Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Amygdala on Wed Jul 27, 2016 12:03 am

Hello! Long-time lurker here, and only now do I feel like making a profile and contributing, only after the forum is largely dead. But... I think that's fine. You're a nice lot, and so I will post.

I've decided to date again after one ruinous relationship and years of sucking my soul dry through media consumption and mindless internet browsing. And it's happening amidst several other decisions I'm making after my own predicted catalyst: becoming tired of my own shit. Call it my "crystallization of discontent."

Adolescence is predictable: I was a troll and typical male geek forged in the hellfires of 4chan's boards up until I noticed the blood on my hands, and made strides to self-improve. One year later, and I was dating a cool girl and stressed fostering that relationship with finding myself... largely, to perceived standards laid out by society. Another year later and I'm single, now just scrambling to be the man I failed to be for that ex, despite not wanting her back. Add a third year, fatigue, and an empty life, add #gamergate, cap and shake, and suddenly I'm flirting with the misogynist sectors of the internet. I don't agree with many of the things they say and I feel awful for associating myself with them, but I've been rejected by the more progressive sectors I thought I had found good company in. If you're a Beast Wars fan, I felt (and I still do) very much like Dinobot.

In the past few weeks, I've begun doing wonderful things I thought I was powerless to do. I now make small talk with my colleagues instead of glowering at them or avoiding all contact. I now exercise a bit, and go for long walks more frequently (thanks to Pokemon GO, admittedly). I'm also fairly clueless as to how I go about it, but I absolutely must need to forge a personality that is more than just "video games." I've got many things I'd like to say, but mostly I just want to be more kind, positive, and emotionally resilient in ways that will hold despite internal and external factors, and how to hold off another "dark" period forever.

For what it's worth, I have been seeing therapists for the past several months and I will continue to do so. They have helped me solve several of my demons, and I have solved several others through my own painful trial and error.

Anyway, struggling to end this post on a high note, but I hope to have wonderful discussions with all of you!
avatar
Amygdala

Posts : 16
Reputation : 5
Join date : 2016-07-26

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Enail on Wed Jul 27, 2016 12:10 am

Welcome, Amygdala! I will try not to hold it against you that you're out playing Pokemon GO when I still haven't gotten it working on my crappy phone Razz
avatar
Enail
Admin

Posts : 3152
Reputation : 1471
Join date : 2014-09-22

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Amygdala on Wed Jul 27, 2016 12:16 am

Enail wrote:Welcome, Amygdala! I will try not to hold it against you that you're out playing Pokemon GO when I still haven't gotten it working on my crappy phone Razz

It is at once the best use of time and the worst use of time. Don't worry about it!
avatar
Amygdala

Posts : 16
Reputation : 5
Join date : 2016-07-26

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Guest on Wed Jul 27, 2016 4:45 am

- Likes Beast Wars.
- Plays Bloodborne.


Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Amygdala on Wed Jul 27, 2016 9:35 am

avatar
Amygdala

Posts : 16
Reputation : 5
Join date : 2016-07-26

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Prajnaparamita on Wed Jul 27, 2016 12:24 pm

Welcome welcome welcome Amygdala! Yeah it's true things have gotten pretty quiet here, but I prefer to think of it as having reached the golden age of our community, waking up from our afternoon naps and shuffleboard games for anime discussions and reminiscing about back in the days all the flamewars we had and drive by trolls we fought off, darn kids these days don't know what it's like we had to post uphill in the snow both ways...

Anyway! It sounds kinda like you're in a similar place as I am at the moment--we might be coming at this from different backgrounds, but I'm also really trying to work on building emotional resilience and not getting so easily blown about by external or internal stressors, and trying to actually apply what it is that I learn in therapy into my life. Also like the whole finding a life and hobbies and interests and shit. But before I get any more into this sappy heart to heart with an internet stranger shit, I gotta ask the most crucial of questions:

Instinct, Mystic or Valor?

(Edit: Yo Werel just because I said "Golden Age" doesn't mean you're allowed to sacrifice us all to be eaten alive by demons, okay?!)

_________________
Foster! It saves lives! And kittens! People will just give you kittens! For free!
avatar
Prajnaparamita

Posts : 375
Reputation : 209
Join date : 2015-02-05

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by BasedBuzzed on Wed Jul 27, 2016 1:52 pm

There's an enormous spectrum between 8chan and SRS, you'll fit in somewhere (or even better, you'll end up in groups of various political angles). Also, most folks in meatspace largely do not care for the minute details of pop culture controversy du jour, so thoughts of "tainted forever" are easily quashed. Good to see that you're doing better!

_________________
Pompeii, VIII.2 (in the basilica); 1904: "O walls, you have held up so much tedious graffiti that I am amazed that you have not already collapsed in ruin."
avatar
BasedBuzzed

Posts : 811
Reputation : 267
Join date : 2014-10-01

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by litterature on Wed Jul 27, 2016 4:47 pm

Welcome! Grin

litterature

Posts : 232
Reputation : 89
Join date : 2015-04-03

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Amygdala on Wed Jul 27, 2016 8:48 pm

I am full Mystic. Amazing some people take these teams so seriously.

Prajnaparamita wrote:(Edit: Yo Werel just because I said "Golden Age" doesn't mean you're allowed to sacrifice us all to be eaten alive by demons, okay?!)

I dunno, that sounds OK.
avatar
Amygdala

Posts : 16
Reputation : 5
Join date : 2016-07-26

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Prajnaparamita on Wed Jul 27, 2016 10:42 pm

Amygdala wrote:I am full Mystic. Amazing some people take these teams so seriously.

Haha yeah it's irrational tribalism in its most base and vulgar form, but goddamn it if it isn't fun! I wonder if this isn't what people who have emotional investment in sportsball teams feel like in regards to their rivals...

I, for one, have been enjoying greatly Team Valor's reputation as being made up entirely of twelve year old twats normally found on Xbox Live, mostly because I'm a 5'1 little blonde girl whose normal approach to conflict is to baking everyone fresh peach pie and desperately hoping that homemade baked goods will just magically make all the disagreement disappear. So of course all my Mystic friends for the past week have been hearing from me a constant stream of "YO MYSTIC IMMA FUCK YOUR MOM CUZ YOU ALL HAVE ONE MOM BECAUSE SHE'S THAT MUCH OF A SLUT AND IMMA FUCK HER PWNED BY VALOR WOOT"

_________________
Foster! It saves lives! And kittens! People will just give you kittens! For free!
avatar
Prajnaparamita

Posts : 375
Reputation : 209
Join date : 2015-02-05

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Enail on Wed Jul 27, 2016 11:03 pm

Prajnaparamita wrote:normal approach to conflict is to baking everyone fresh peach pie and desperately hoping that homemade baked goods will just magically make all the disagreement disappear.

Holy shit! PRAJNA I HAVE A MAJOR VERY IMPORTANT AND DEFINITELY NOT MADE UP FOR PIE-RELATED PURPOSES CONFLICT DISAGREEMENT ANGRY WITH YOU RAGE!1!!!
avatar
Enail
Admin

Posts : 3152
Reputation : 1471
Join date : 2014-09-22

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Prajnaparamita on Thu Jul 28, 2016 12:04 am

Enail wrote:
Prajnaparamita wrote:normal approach to conflict is to baking everyone fresh peach pie and desperately hoping that homemade baked goods will just magically make all the disagreement disappear.

Holy shit! PRAJNA I HAVE A MAJOR VERY IMPORTANT AND DEFINITELY NOT MADE UP FOR PIE-RELATED PURPOSES CONFLICT DISAGREEMENT ANGRY WITH YOU RAGE!1!!!

AHHHHH PLEASE DON'T BE ANGRY WITH ME I CAN'T STAND PEOPLE BEING ANGRY AT ME HAVE A PLATE FULL OF PEACH CUSTARD TARTS--will that make it all better?! Please let it make it all better! Waaaaaah!



_________________
Foster! It saves lives! And kittens! People will just give you kittens! For free!
avatar
Prajnaparamita

Posts : 375
Reputation : 209
Join date : 2015-02-05

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Enail on Thu Jul 28, 2016 12:08 am

Lovestruck
avatar
Enail
Admin

Posts : 3152
Reputation : 1471
Join date : 2014-09-22

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Wondering on Thu Jul 28, 2016 3:01 am

Prajnaparamita wrote:
Amygdala wrote:I am full Mystic. Amazing some people take these teams so seriously.

Haha yeah it's irrational tribalism in its most base and vulgar form, but goddamn it if it isn't fun! I wonder if this isn't what people who have emotional investment in sportsball teams feel like in regards to their rivals...

I, for one, have been enjoying greatly Team Valor's reputation as being made up entirely of twelve year old twats normally found on Xbox Live, mostly because I'm a 5'1 little blonde girl whose normal approach to conflict is to baking everyone fresh peach pie and desperately hoping that homemade baked goods will just magically make all the disagreement disappear. So of course all my Mystic friends for the past week have been hearing from me a constant stream of "YO MYSTIC IMMA FUCK YOUR MOM CUZ YOU ALL HAVE ONE MOM BECAUSE SHE'S THAT MUCH OF A SLUT AND IMMA FUCK HER PWNED BY VALOR WOOT"

You guys are playing a very different game from the one my husband is playing, I think. I never hear him talk about this sort of thing. Smile

Oh, and he's Mystic, too.

Wondering

Posts : 1101
Reputation : 425
Join date : 2014-10-01

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Guest on Thu Jul 28, 2016 3:12 pm

Sup, dudebro! The forums aren't necessarily dead, people still post. Not as often, but they do! Plus the community is tiny and folks here have families and stuff outside of the site.

Prajnaparamita wrote:
I, for one, have been enjoying greatly Team Valor's reputation as being made up entirely of twelve year old twats normally found on Xbox Live, mostly because I'm a 5'1 little blonde girl whose normal approach to conflict is to baking everyone fresh peach pie and desperately hoping that homemade baked goods will just magically make all the disagreement disappear. So of course all my Mystic friends for the past week have been hearing from me a constant stream of "YO MYSTIC IMMA FUCK YOUR MOM CUZ YOU ALL HAVE ONE MOM BECAUSE SHE'S THAT MUCH OF A SLUT AND IMMA FUCK HER PWNED BY VALOR WOOT"

Can we have a conflict and make a fresh pizza pie too? I mean, pizza's a type of pie isn't it? Shiny/thrilled

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Prajnaparamita on Thu Jul 28, 2016 11:22 pm

The Mikey wrote:
Can we have a conflict and make a fresh pizza pie too? I mean, pizza's a type of pie isn't it? Shiny/thrilled

INDULGE IN WOOD FIRED HOMEMADE PIZZA NOT HATRED




Sorry not sorry for turning this into the "Prajna posts food pics" thread Grin

_________________
Foster! It saves lives! And kittens! People will just give you kittens! For free!
avatar
Prajnaparamita

Posts : 375
Reputation : 209
Join date : 2015-02-05

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Guest on Fri Jul 29, 2016 12:29 am

Prajnaparamita wrote:
The Mikey wrote:
Can we have a conflict and make a fresh pizza pie too? I mean, pizza's a type of pie isn't it? Shiny/thrilled

INDULGE IN WOOD FIRED HOMEMADE PIZZA NOT HATRED

Sorry not sorry for turning this into the "Prajna posts food pics" thread Grin

AWW YIIIISS MUHFUGGIN PIZZAAAA!


Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Re: Gratuitous self-intro [rant[?]]

Post by Werel on Sat Aug 20, 2016 8:33 am

Super-belated welcome, Amygdala! Forums aren't dead, they're just... yeah, in their golden age, napping in the sunshine and waving to passerby from their rocking chairs on the veranda. Razz

Hope you're finding it relatively comfy here in a place that is (fingers crossed) one of the less misogynist corners of the nerd internet. Welcome, bienvenue, willkommen!

Prajnaparamita wrote:(Edit: Yo Werel just because I said "Golden Age" doesn't mean you're allowed to sacrifice us all to be eaten alive by demons, okay?!)
DAGNABBIT THERE GO MY PLANS FOR THIS AFTERNOON Angry
avatar
Werel
Moderator of "Meeting People and Dating Advice"

Posts : 1704
Reputation : 913
Join date : 2014-09-25

View user profile

Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top


 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum