Random acts of kindness and trust

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Post by V on Sun Jan 25, 2015 3:19 pm

So often on this site we talk about interactions with strangers.  It could be about romantic approaches or street harassment amongst other things.  Often these instances and the debate around them are problematic.

I thought I would post a number of examples of random acts of trust and kindness I have been on the receiving end of.

I have decided to put it it in this subfiorum because I think it fits in with "Society' and "Gender" but not with dating or relationships so much.

When I first started work back in the day,  I would sometimes fall asleep on the train home after a few drinks with coworkers.   On several occasions I was awoken by women whom I didn't know from Eve, and told that I needed to get off as this was my station.

They must have recognised me as a regular commuter and were kind enough to make sure I didn't miss my stop.  I also mention trust because they chose to interact with a slightly inebriated (snoring no doubt) male stranger at night in an admittedly crowded place.

That happened on more than one occasion but on another individual occasion I was waiting for a tram at night along with quite a lot of other people because of some delay.  I must have looked at least a bit agitated because a random woman made a point of reassuring me that everything would be sorted out soon.  Now I'm pretty sure she didn't actually pat me on the hand (!) but it had  that sort of feeling.

And another time I was waiting at a tram stop at night by myself.  There were two women also waiting but they didn't know each other.  The next scheduled service was some time away and one of the women approached me and asked me where I was going and maybe if we could get a taxi together.  The three of us ended up doing so.  I personally have my own trust issues so that was something of a big deal for me too.

Anyway I just wanted to mention a few ( and I could mention more)  examples of trust and the kindness from the "opposite" gender not because I don't think women can be kind (!) but because trust does take a certain amount of vulnerability and exposure to risk.

I just wanted to post some examples of positive examples of interaction with strangers.

Not sure what I expect from here but all discussion is welcome.

V.

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Post by kleenestar on Tue Jan 27, 2015 3:58 pm

We live on a very steep hill that has a fair bike commuter population.

One day I came home to find an exhausted biker sprawled on my front lawn, having what looked to my layman's eye like heatstroke. (Did I mention it's a very steep hill?) He told me he'd already called his partner to pick him up, and he didn't want to come inside into the air conditioning, but I brought him cool water and hung out with him until his partner arrived. But basically I invited a total stranger into my house because he looked really tired and sick. Razz

Is that the kind of thing you were looking for?
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Post by V on Wed Jan 28, 2015 11:15 am

@Kleenestar, thank you.  I'm sure that that poor man appreciated your kindness.

I'm not quite sure what I'm looking for. Neutral


Last edited by V on Wed Jan 28, 2015 11:25 am; edited 1 time in total

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Post by V on Wed Jan 28, 2015 11:16 am

Continued

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Post by V on Wed Jan 28, 2015 11:23 am

Sorry new at this!

I want to say that any experiences of kindness received or given are very welcome!

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Post by Guest on Wed Jan 28, 2015 12:31 pm

This isn't a trust one exactly, but I was at a restaurant with a group of adults I don't see a lot and my three kids. And the kids were being good-ish, for kids, but one of our party had ordered a meal that took a long time to cook, and they were getting restless. I was having to spend a lot of time managing them and their fidgets instead of socializing.

At the table next to us was this couple in their sixties, and at a certain point, the man leaned over and asked, "Would this help?" and produced a beautiful coloring book. "It's a gift," he said, and went back to his conversation. The kids were thrilled and excited, and spent the meal coloring these beautiful geometric pictures from the book. I got to have my conversation, and the kids were happy and cheerful.

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Post by Mel on Wed Jan 28, 2015 3:25 pm

I've been impressed by how quickly and freely people will offer their seats on the public transit when I have my baby with me in his carrier. Pretty much every time the bus has been crowded it's happened right away. I got four offers in the course of a few minutes the other day, which I felt almost bad turning down (he's actually happier with me standing a lot of the time)--I hope they felt good about being kind all the same.
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Post by Werel on Wed Jan 28, 2015 4:21 pm

Was walking my dog a few months ago and passed this young guy, real real tough-looking, and his girlfriend. Girl stopped and petted Dog and that was cool, and then the dude went to pet him too. Dog is scared of beards and decided to be a shithead, and growled and snapped at Young Tough. I was all "oh god I'm so sorry did he get you??" and the guy just laughed and said "nah, nah, and it wouldn't matter if he had. Aloha!" I don't know if that's a story about that guy trusting my dog, or trusting me to control my dog, or me trusting that guy not to throw a fit over my dog's misbehavior, but I feel a lot of friendly trust for the Young Tough Guys in my neighborhood because most of our interactions are really nice and chill like that.

A slightly weirder story of trust: last semester, I was approached by a kid, maybe 9 or 10, at the bus stop. She just came up with her little roller suitcase and started chatting with me, telling me about her karate class and laying down some CRAZY kid wisdom*, and we got on the bus together. Me: "You know, it might not be the greatest idea to just hang out with strangers at bus stops. Do you do this a lot?" Her: "No, of course not! You're the first person I've ever talked to like this. You seem okay." (My boyfriend, later that night: "you know that was just the ghost of your younger self, right?") I appreciated her trust, while also being like OH GOD KIDDO DON'T TRUST ME I'M A STRANGER Uh-oh

*Gems include: "When I'm really angry, I go find a really hot rock in the sun to sit on. Then after a while I'm too hot to be angry." And: "The bus drivers on this route are really nice, except when they're having trouble at home." And: "Do you have a kid?" "No, I'm not really ready for that kind of responsibility." "(wryly) Neither was my mom."
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Post by Caffeinated on Thu Feb 26, 2015 2:26 pm

Yesterday I went to Trader Joe's to pick up a couple things. As I was walking in, an older man (roughly retirement age) was just in front of me. He picked up a shopping basket, then saw me behind him and offered it to me. There was a moment of awkward hesitation between us and then I gave him my best smile. I'd wanted to get a basket but been slightly worried about bending down to get it because of how this pregnancy has screwed up my back. We then exchanged a few words of good morning and how are you before getting on with our individual shopping.
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