Speed Dating Advice

Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Speed Dating Advice

Post by Gman on Sun Jun 07, 2015 5:41 am

Hey all, so I decided to go ahead and try out a speed dating event that is happening in my city this Wednesday. I don't have great expectations from it, hopefully it'll turn out at the worst to be an interesting evening where I met and talked to all sorts of people and thus simply practiced a bit more on my social skills.

I'm posting here just in case anyone else has ever attended such an event and if they did, what kind of advice do you think can be usefull for me while I'm there, in case I actually DO meet someone there who catches my interest.

Gman
Gman

Posts : 233
Reputation : 57
Join date : 2014-10-01

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by reboot on Sun Jun 07, 2015 9:32 am

I never did it, but my friend did when it was super popular. The big thing she found was to avoid some of the basic biographic questions because half way through you will be sick of hearing them. Things like "where did you grow up?", "where did you go to school?" etc also do not tell you much about a person.

The type of questions she liked were: what was the last book you read/movie you watched?, what is your favorite thing to do on holiday?, what is your favorite place to visit in the city? Are there any songs that make you just want to get up and dance?

Big thing here is do not ask anything requiring too much thought because you have a time limit, which can make some people freeze, panic and feel stupid if they do not have a ready answer.
reboot
reboot
Moderator of "Other Relationships" and "Gender, Identity and Society"

Posts : 2514
Reputation : 1005
Join date : 2014-09-24

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by Guest on Sun Jun 07, 2015 10:14 am

Focus on chemistry.

Try to make her laugh, but not at the expense of showing her who you are. Come up with some good stories you can tell in half a minute or so.

Take notes after each person, or you'll forget them.

There will be unstructured time before and after and maybe in the middle of the event. Use it. Follow up with people you liked, or approach people you haven't met yet. Everyone is there to meet people, so you've got the best possible environment for cold approaches.

If you drink, one drink will help you relax. More is a mistake.

Be friendly to the other men. Really. The guys that don't look like insecure assholes.

Look at the whole event as practice on approaches, rather than a results-oriented experience. Check to see whether your place guarantees as least one match -- mine did, which meant I could go to future events free if no one liked me.

Good luck!

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by ChrissyOrig on Sun Jun 07, 2015 4:35 pm

Gman wrote:Hey all, so I decided to go ahead and try out a speed dating event that is happening in my city this Wednesday.

Hi Gman, I've never gone to this type of event, but I've been thinking about it. Would you post about your experience with it afterwards please? I think it could be useful to some of us. And have fun!

ChrissyOrig

Posts : 29
Reputation : 12
Join date : 2014-10-01

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by readertorider on Sun Jun 07, 2015 7:15 pm

Captain Awkward has a guest post on speed dating from a while back that may be interesting to you, ChrissyOrg.

Have fun & good luck Gman!
readertorider
readertorider

Posts : 155
Reputation : 58
Join date : 2014-10-23

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by gaboz on Mon Jun 08, 2015 3:14 am

i've done a couple of times. Its fun but dont expect much for the aftermath.But its really good social and anxiety training.

_________________
Sucking At Something Is The First Step To Being Sort Of Good At Something

gaboz

Posts : 53
Reputation : 15
Join date : 2014-10-03

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by Gman on Mon Jun 08, 2015 10:29 am

ChrissyOrig wrote:
Gman wrote:Hey all, so I decided to go ahead and try out a speed dating event that is happening in my city this Wednesday.

Hi Gman, I've never gone to this type of event, but I've been thinking about it. Would you post about your experience with it afterwards please? I think it could be useful to some of us. And have fun!

Yeah, I'll think I'll maybe post something here once it's behind me - though don't count on it too much, I have a pretty hectic week in front of me as is. But I hope to at least give you all a quick summary of it :-)
Gman
Gman

Posts : 233
Reputation : 57
Join date : 2014-10-01

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by Gman on Thu Jun 11, 2015 4:58 am

Well as promised here is the summary - and in short........ well, nothing happened.

Like literally. I get there a bit early and there are 4 other guys and another girl. I think "whatever" because I was there early and wait. After a short while, a female friend of mine from the dancing scene arrives and we begin talking (though I'm not interested in her, I actually did try to ask her out a very long time ago and she refused and were are just friends ever since). By that point there are something like 15 guys and only 4 girls (my friend included). Most of the guys looked like they are past 40 the vibe they were giving around was kind of creepy too, my friend basically clinged to me and told me to keep talking to her to keep all the creepers at bay.
After a 30 minutes delay from the start, the organizer goes "sorry, this event is being canceled as there are simply barley any woman - you are all free to get back your money" (there was an entry fee). So me and my friend took our money back and bolted out of there. That was probably the worst speed dating event attempt in the history of mankind... Yikes.

However the rest of the night was far more pleasent. Decided to hang around the area and see what is going around if I was already out of the house and all. Met my sister with her husband and friends of thiers and we hanged out a bit. Went to eat some pizza and met there more friends, which was cool.

After that - spent 20 minutes talking with a friend from abroad using facebooks messengers internet voice-calling service. It was so refreshing hearing a friendly voice that I haven't heard in such a long time again. (Note - this is the same person I met during my trip to Milan to a dance festival

So all around, the evening wasn't a total disaster. However, I am sorry to dissapoint anyone expecting speed dating tips, as that didn't even come to exist. It's really weird... maybe it's a sign about the city I live in, which has a much higher amount of religous people of all kinds (compared to other parts of the country), who don't really attend these kind of events - which have already a bad stigma about them as is.
Gman
Gman

Posts : 233
Reputation : 57
Join date : 2014-10-01

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by Guest on Thu Jun 11, 2015 2:15 pm

Aw! Sounds like you were at a bad event. The good ones have registration so there are even numbers -- you may not get in, but if you do, you aren't wasting your time.

Guest
Guest


Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by Gman on Fri Jun 12, 2015 7:56 am

ElizaJane wrote:Aw!  Sounds like you were at a bad event.  The good ones have registration so there are even numbers -- you may not get in, but if you do, you aren't wasting your time.

There was registration - numbers and everything. The women just never showed up..... so I don't know. The organizer was also puzzled because of this - he told me that he has done 2 other events like this already in my city and this is the first time where the women were a no show at all. So go figure Shrug
Gman
Gman

Posts : 233
Reputation : 57
Join date : 2014-10-01

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Speed Dating Advice Empty Re: Speed Dating Advice

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

Back to top


 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum