Waiting for someone to text, call, hang out, etc. also, I am going Machiavellian. ADV and Opinions desperately needed.

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Post by Enail on Fri Jun 12, 2015 6:03 pm

Alex1989 wrote:
And how long will that take? I'm not open to the idea that it will take DECADES to solve this dilemma. I prefer it takes less than 36 months.

I have no idea. It would probably depend on a lot of different factors. But I think it's probably less of a "put X amount of time in and at the end everything will be totally perfect" and more "as you put in more time on it, you'll see more improvements that will make things easier and improve your chances." There's no such thing as perfect, for anyone. But if it's something that's holding you back, working on it will probably resolve it more quickly than not dealing with it, right?
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Post by Guest on Fri Jun 12, 2015 6:06 pm

Enail wrote:
Alex1989 wrote:
And how long will that take? I'm not open to the idea that it will take DECADES to solve this dilemma. I prefer it takes less than 36 months.

I have no idea. It would probably depend on a lot of different factors. But I think it's probably less of a "put X amount of time in and at the end everything will be totally perfect" and more "as you put in more time on it, you'll see more improvements that will make things easier and improve your chances." There's no such thing as perfect, for anyone. But if it's something that's holding you back, working on it will probably resolve it more quickly than not dealing with it, right?

.....right.

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Post by Guest on Fri Jun 12, 2015 8:54 pm

PintsizeBro wrote:Alex, you're not a bad guy, but you're really bitter and really angry. Like, almost all the time you post here. How do you honestly expect people to react when you make statements like you no longer trust women as a group, so every woman must work to earn your trust? Or getting angry with people who aren't free to hang out when you want to hang out. Do you think they can't tell? When I had a friend who got angry every time I turned down an invitation to hang out, I wanted to see him less, not more.

Re-reading this, I am starting to think I am a bad guy...

I always had questions like "How can I trust women if they make me jump through endless hoops just to be friends with them?", at one point I even thought of trying to learn how to hypnotize people to get what I want, I know that was the DUMBEST idea ever, but as Romeo said in Romeo and Juliet (I FUCKING CURSE THE ROTTEN SACK OF HORSE SHIT NAMED SHAKESPEARE FOR WRITING THIS ACCURSED PLAY, DAMN THAT BASTARD TO THE NINTH CIRCLE OF HELL TO BE GNAWED BY SATAN HIMSELF FOR ALL ETERNITY!!) "Tempt not a desperate man", I was desperate, really desperate to be with somebody who cared about me, UNCONDITIONALLY, my mom didn't, my family didn't, even my therapist didn't...

I felt that a persons worth is in how people like him, after being bullied for far too long, I felt worthless, abandoned, cold... I wanted the very thing everyone else has denied me for years.

I have manipulated people, lied to people, tricked and begged to people to love me, I did not want love, I NEEDED it to live, now I lash out at people I believe to hate me when in reality they cared about me, I was consumed by my pity and self hatred that I did not believe the compliments they gave me.

Now I am lashing out on all of you, I am a bad guy, I don't even deserve to be allowed to post here anymore, you take time out of your day to help people with REAL problems and I end up taking advantage of all of you, abusing you, taking all my frustration out on all of you... I'll understand if you hate me, some people already do.

I am going to take eselle's advice and go away... I might not even come back... but I have turned into the opposite of what I wanted to be...

if anyone has anything to say, I prefer you PM me or email me.


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Post by Enail on Fri Jun 12, 2015 9:31 pm

Alex, I think it's good that you recognize that desperation and distress can lead you to some harmful behaviors even if that's not how you want to act.  Remember that you're not alone in having behaved in harmful ways - everyone does some things they're not proud of, and it can be especially easy to do when you're hurting - but what makes a good person is being willing to see that in yourself and make changes to act in ways that align with the person you want to be. And I think that the person you want to be is a kind and sincere person, and I think kindness and sincerity are very much a part of you, even if sometimes your expression of those aspects of yourself get tangled up in your pain and fear.

Please look after yourself while you're taking a break, and come back and let us know how you're doing whenever you'd like to Smile

ETA: Oops, sorry, didn't see the last bit. I'll PM this as well!
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