How do you impress a girl?

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How do you impress a girl?

Post by Dannyboy on Sat Mar 26, 2016 2:54 am

Hey there its me again.

I have this coffee date on Tuesday with a girl that I met on OKC, she's very artistically talented (i.e. she can draw and paint). The last time I took an artistic girl on a coffee shop date she rejected me afterwards, saying that she could see us only as acquaintances. I fear that I bored this girl thanks to my extreme lack of talent. So, in order to avoid the same situation, what should I do to impress my date?

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Re: How do you impress a girl?

Post by reboot on Sat Mar 26, 2016 11:08 am

In my opinion, you cannot "do" anything to impress a stranger on purpose. You need to know someone well to know what would impress them and even then it can backfire. On a first date it generally a bad call because you might pick something you think "generic artistic woman" would be impressed by and it might be something a bunch of men have also done on dates with her, thus making it clear you see her as "generic artistic woman" and not an individual.

Your last date might have been bored, might have decided you two had no chemistry, might have just felt you were incompatible, etc.. Your not having artistic talent might have been a positive since it would avoid artistic competition and one upsmanship. You do not actually know. You might be trying to correct something that was not a problem and creating more.

Give us some details about how you met and how much you know about her and we can help give you some scripts and ideas


Last edited by reboot on Sat Mar 26, 2016 11:10 am; edited 1 time in total
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Re: How do you impress a girl?

Post by Robjection on Sat Mar 26, 2016 11:08 am

You fear you bored this girl due to your extreme lack of talent? Did you get that information straight from her? If not, then I wonder if you're looking at the problem from the wrong angle - maybe it's not that you need to impress this new girl with some sort of talent, maybe it's just that you need to show that you have something - no matter how small - going for you. Something that makes you interesting.

What sorts of things do you get up to in your spare time? That'd be a good place to start.

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Re: How do you impress a girl?

Post by Enail on Sat Mar 26, 2016 12:50 pm

Honestly, I don't think talent is what makes a person interesting or boring. A talent in something impressive or unusual can be a little attention grabber to make someone impressed or curious to know you at the start, and on paper it might be a neat thing on someone's character sheet, but once you're on that date, in person, you're not going to be sitting there drawing pictures to entertain them, no matter how much artistic talent you have. And actively trying to impress your date is just as likely to come off as braggy and boring.

So I think you're barking up the wrong tree. Interests, passion in your life, ways of thinking about things, enthusiasm for doing or trying things together, chemistry, interest in hearing about the other person, those are the kinds of things that make me think "this person is interesting" or not, much more than talent or attempts to impress.
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Re: How do you impress a girl?

Post by Dannyboy on Sat Mar 26, 2016 1:43 pm

@ Robjection Well, I play guitar (poorly, I only started seriously practicing last October.), I like to go on long walks through the woods or in the park( I live in Colorado, lots of National Parks and such), I iccaisionally write creatively but I'm usually too self conscious to finish anything more than a really short story, I like to read novels, like to spend time looking things up on the Internet, and I play video games,. So yeah, I'm very very boring.

@Reeboot We met on OKC, I saw that we liked some of the same bands and I messaged her. She later gave me her number and we've texted sporadically since. I mentioned a coffee date awhile back and she said she like to go and would let me know when it worked for her schedule wise. Yesterday she texted me and asked me if Monday worked, I told her Tuesday was better and now, here we are.

I know a bit about her. She told me about a lot of problems she had in high school ( not posting specifics for privacy), she's very liberal which is good cause so am I. We both like Myazaki films, which is good. Besides that, I know she draws these surreal ink drawings and is planning to go to college for art.

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Re: How do you impress a girl?

Post by reboot on Sat Mar 26, 2016 2:35 pm

Some good topics might be:
-Art: When did you start drawing? What got you into it? Are you only into ink? Have you ever wanted to try any other medium?
- Music: Ask about the band's you both like. Has she seen them live? If she could come up with the perfect music festival, who would be playing?
-Film: Ask about other filmmakers she likes. Ask her what she thinks makes someone a great filmmaker and what makes a great film

And remember to have your own answers to any of the speculative questions
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