Re: Rants

[Mel]

<mod> Technically the Rants thread (and any thread labeled [rant]) should be for venting and people to offer sympathy, not to seek/give advice or to evaluate the topic being vented about. Mikey, if you'd like to actually discuss the article/your dating difficulties/etc. it's better if you make a new thread for that. If you did just want to vent, probably better not to ask questions as part of that (at least not questions that aren't clearly rhetorical). And others, in this thread and any other Rants thread, I think we should generally ask "Do you want advice about that or just to vent" and get an answer before offering advice. </mod>

If Mikey wants to continue the discussion, perhaps we can split off the related posts.

[Guest]

True, Mikey, people don't come with cheat codes which is just the way I like it.

Ah yes, cheat codes, if only. Personally, I like console commands. ;D

ETA: I'm sorry, Mel. That's not my intention, nor is what I wanted to do, so I apologize. Just don't hurt me, I'm squishy. I have enough dating problems as it is that still remain unsolved that I wouldn't know where to start with or without a thread.

[Mel]

ETA: I'm sorry, Mel. That's not my intention, nor is what I wanted to do, so I apologize. Just don't hurt me, I'm squishy. I have enough dating problems as it is that still remain unsolved that I wouldn't know where to start with or without a thread.

No worries, it was intended as a gentle nudge, not an angry decree! I just found myself wanting to say things in the discussion and then stopping myself because it didn't seem appropriate for the Rants thread... and that's exactly why the Rants thread isn't a great place to try to have a discussion.

If you'd like to start a thread simply to discuss the article that kicked this off, and what people think of it and the apparent contradictions, you could certainly do that (without trying to make it all about your specific dating problems if that feels overwhelming).

[Guest]

If you'd like to start a thread simply to discuss the article that kicked this off, and what people think of it and the apparent contradictions, you could certainly do that (without trying to make it all about your specific dating problems if that feels overwhelming).

Nah, it's fine. Wouldn't feel right criticizing something I have zero experience in. But I can critize it for being somewhat contradictory. But nah, I don't need to make a thread about it, tbh, I just needed to let it out like I need a gorram hug.

[SadisticToaster]

When Water-Aid said their mission was to give water to those most in need, somehow, I thought they meant they'd be giving water to poor people in Africa and the Middle East - not handing out free bottles of water to rich bankers in London

[InkAndComb]

If I hear one more professor tell me how group projects are good skills for outside of college, I. WILL. EXPLODE.

Working around people's schedules in college is not the same as working with colleagues in the same occupation for obvious reasons. Furthermore, when a professor openly says "I'm not going to micromanage, I expect you to take care of slackers in your group and I will give you all the same grade", you openly are admitting that you are going to give slackers the credit of the hard workers. You also subtly suggest that you don't really care what's happening, just take care of it yourself/not my problem. This is not useful in a required class that has freshman through seniors, and it is not useful if you know there is a history of issues and do not provide skillset to address them.

Also, I feel like it's lazy. You can't teach skills to someone who doesn't have them, and if everyone is approaching with a different skill level, you need to treat it as such! If you want to TEACH SKILLS, you have to TEACH them! You can't just say "I want you to learn this, I won't interact or keep an eye on things to make sure they get out of hand, laissez faire is the most effective teaching method MUAHAHA".

Lastly, if you know there is a student you have (obviously) kicked out of class multiple times and interrupts class, then allow them to (visually, even) be rude and crass to beyond socially-acceptable levels to a group they work with (who try to redirect the behavior), you...kind of suck. As a person and a teacher. Your job is to help your students, not throw them to the sharks and tell them "handle it" when even you don't know how. Especially if they come to you for help and you tell them "didn't they teach you this in Humanities 1?" No I did not read Aristotle:Poetics in Hum. 1, and no I did not learn how to deal with The Worst Group Member Ever.

/Rant over

[nearly_takuan]

Thanks for saving me the trouble of interacting with you further, I suppose, but no, I won't "go home to mommy" because that's unreasonably far away for someone with no car. Instead I'm just going to ride a bus back to the apartment where I pay half the rent and do literally all of the housework except my roommate's laundry.

---

I'd ask someone else out instead, maybe hopefully someone better, but I'm starting to think there's nobody like that.

---

Back in middle school when I first learned about homosexuality and homophobia, I remember I spent like a couple weeks thinking the existence of homophobia meant homosexuality was a disorder/disability, before I learned and thought about it enough to think that wasn't really the right way to put it. But I seem to have circled around somewhere.

"Asexuality is not a disorder," insists AVEN. That claim sure feels less true over time.

---

Maybe your study should make some kind of distinction between the Asians who flew in on work visas with fancy diplomas and a lot of money, and the Asians who came in on a boat to work for coupons until most of them got thrown in prison because of what they looked like while the rest either interrogated PoWs of their same ethnicity or shipped out to France to die saving a bunch of white dudes. But naw, the average income level of all those groups forcibly welded together totally implies every individual in that group has access to all kinds of opportunities, right?

While you're at it, maybe think about why a certain subset of that broad ethnic category has a long tradition of "picking themselves up by the bootstraps" yet also on average leans heavily liberal.

[Guest]

OK, flu jab, you were quick, cheap and entirely painless, and I thank you for that. But riddle me this: how come my arm hurts now, AND IT'S NOT EVEN THAT ARM???

[Guest]

Okay, people, when I have been sitting here for a month -- a MONTH -- begging you to have someone who actually knows what they're doing help me figure out my math (or better yet, do the math for me) to no avail, you are not allowed to get cranky with me because the formulas I have been telling you in these exact words that I am "pulling out of my ass" are imprecise and/or incorrect.

[Guest]

Ugh, EJ, I feel you on this one. My previous workplace was a haven for this kind of fuckwittery (thanks kleenestar!):

Me: I don't feel confident pricing this thing, can you go through it with me?
Boss: I don't have time, it will be fine, just do it anyway.
Me: OK, but I want to register that I asked for help.
*weeks pass*
Boss: Hey, you messed up pricing this thing! Haven't I told you to ask for help if you're unsure?
Me: *fumes*

[azazel]

Okay, people, when I have been sitting here for a month -- a MONTH -- begging you to have someone who actually knows what they're doing help me figure out my math (or better yet, do the math for me) to no avail, you are not allowed to get cranky with me because the formulas I have been telling you in these exact words that I am "pulling out of my ass" are imprecise and/or incorrect.  

Can you describe the math problem in a different thread?

I need distractions and maybe I (or someone else) can help

[Guest]

Okay, people, when I have been sitting here for a month -- a MONTH -- begging you to have someone who actually knows what they're doing help me figure out my math (or better yet, do the math for me) to no avail, you are not allowed to get cranky with me because the formulas I have been telling you in these exact words that I am "pulling out of my ass" are imprecise and/or incorrect.  

Can you describe the math problem in a different thread?

I need distractions and maybe I (or someone else) can help

Unfortunately, no: most of what I do is under a really, really intense NDA-umbrella.  As significantly, it's less about solving a problem and more about figuring out how to describe a problem mathematically when we don't really have enough data to know the actual shape of said problem.

[azazel]

I understand.

On topic rant but related to the above: Inactivity is driving me crazy.
So is the job application process.

[nearly_takuan]

Third'd, though with me it was more about deadlines/priorities/expectations.

Me: I know we're all hoping I can get all three of these things done by the end of our current sprint, but in case the usual thing happens and a customer raises one more emergency than we already planned for, which one do you think we can most afford to delay?
Boss: (Long personal story, the moral of which seems to be that smaller deliverables should come first.)
Me: Okay. But, I mean, is there a certain deadline or timetable I should be setting for any of these? When is Representative expecting Project to be ready?
Boss: Well, let me look at our release schedule and I'll get back to you.
*days pass*
Boss: Hey, Representative just pinged me. Can we demo Project tomorrow?
Me: *works an all-nighter to get it ready, after spending several days on other fires instead*

--

Boss: That's all I wanted to talk to you about for today, but did you have any of your own questions?
Me: Just the usual ones—do you think I'm keeping up with this company's expectations of performance and learning curve?
Boss: Yes, I think you seem to be doing fine.
Me: And is there anything in particular I should work on?
Boss: Well, keep learning from Coworker about Process and trying new things.
*this continues for months, until...*
Boss: Hey, so, have you heard about the severance plan they're going to be offering?
Me: Yeah, they announced it at the last org meeting. Seems like we've already been losing a lot of people lately, though...
Boss: Have you looked into it?
Me: Not really.
Boss: Are you going to?
Me: I don't think so. I wasn't really planning on leaving for the next few years, at least.
Boss: Well, just off the record, I think you should look into it.
Me: ....

--

(About a month before I formally left the company, I heard this one.)
Coworker A: Hey, Boss? I'm kind of stuck on a certain issue and I need input from Coworker B before I go ahead with my workaround.
Boss: So talk to him.
Coworker A: Well, that's the problem, he doesn't even have time for a quick meeting, because he's already been assigned to concentrate completely on another task. Can you give him an assignment so it's on record that he gave up some of that time to help me?
Boss: *doesn't respond, doesn't talk to Coworker B*
*days pass*
*project doesn't get done*
Boss: *reassigns Coworker A to another project, files report saying Coworker B doesn't work well with Coworker A*

[username_6916]

Dear $unamed_tech_recruter_at_major_company_you_have_heard_of,

Yes I graduated a year ago. No, I do not have a year of industry experience, unless you count my internships (I don't). No, these statements are not contradictary. Yes, assuming these statements are contradictary creates a catch-22 where I'm not eligable for new grad positions, but I'm also not elegable for other jobs.

[reboot]

This is how I feel about my desk right now

[Kaz]

I moved last week and have spent the past week watching the amount of problems with my new flat go from annoying to worrying to boggling to absurd.

The fridge doesn't work; the oven doesn't heat from below; one of the radiators can't be turned on and the rest of them can't be turned off; the wall in the bathroom is wet and there is mold growing on parts of it; the washing machine has a leak; the faucet for the bathtub/shower also has a leak; the blinds cannot be adjusted to let more/less light through (I am on the freaking ground floor!). It is also well-nigh impossible to get any room out of the range of 14-16 degrees C. I spent today attempting and failing to keep my washing machine from flooding my kitchen and then hand-washing and rinsing the load of dirty laundry I'd put into it. Half of next week seems to be gone to various contractors.

I am trying to finish a bloody PhD while all this is going on.

Oh my god I cannot WAIT until I go home for Christmas.

[SadisticToaster]

Dear $unamed_tech_recruter_at_major_company_you_have_heard_of,

Yes I graduated a year ago. No, I do not have a year of industry experience, unless you count my internships (I don't).

You might not, but they might. A recruiter's goal is to find - as quickly as possible - someone who meets the client's requirements and can do the job ( sadly, this is not always synonymous ).

[eselle28]

I know we're just on the edge of town, fellow drivers, but there are an absolute ton of streetlights along the road and very heavy traffic. There's no need to drive around with your brights on, except for being an asshole.

[WJMorris3]

Dear customer.

It isn't acceptable anymore to refer to Brazil nuts by the name they once went by. Please just call them Brazil nuts like everyone else.

[InkAndComb]

After discussing street harassment and the lack of community effort in eradicating bigotry on campus, it's not appropriate to say "I get that these issues are important, but the best way to stop them from happening is to, like, just stop taking about it. We've heard it all before" . No, these issues came up last week, it is not time to "let it go already because white people feel bad enough". Holy raptor jesus.

[username_6916]

You might not, but they might. A recruiter's goal is to find - as quickly as possible - someone who meets the client's requirements and can do the job ( sadly, this is not always synonymous ).

To be clear, this recruiter works for the $unnamed_tech_company in question.

That's what I'm a bit worried about. That I'll screw up the interview or the job so badly that I'll be blacklisted from the whole company.

[reboot]

Not to derail a rant topic, out and out blacklisting in corporate America is exceptionally rare and generally reserved for those who commit industrial espionage, workplace violence, embezzlement, etc.. Unless you have done any of this, you will not be blacklisted. Maybe not hired, but not blacklisted

Recruiters keep resumes and people that do not match one unit or program get passed along to others that might be a better match if they have a good interview. I know buckets of people who interviewed for one job and were asked to apply for other jobs in other units/programs that they later got. I even know people who got offers for entirely different jobs than the ones they interviewed for. You can even get referrals to different companies if the recruiter knows someone looking for a candidate like you.

This is not the thread to do it, but many of us have experience doing interviews as a job seeker or someone doing the hiring. We can help you figure out how to best answer questions about your experience and walk you through common interview questions.

[nearly_takuan]

My LinkedIn, Facebook, Google+, and email all at once seem suddenly saturated in poisonous parables claiming a can-do attitude is all it takes to vanquish Suffering and Weakness and Being Poor. As a factor, working hard can certainly contribute to that end, but sometimes no matter how many times you flip the coin it still always comes up Tails. Can we not pretend that Capitalism is such a wonderfully egalitarian model, from the perspective of the personal finances of a working class?

I think the example that an uppermiddleclassperson might more easily comprehend is: look at most professional athletes, bodybuilders, fitness models, and so forth. Clearly, they work harder and push themselves past what most of us mere mortals would ever be willing to do. They also, typically, have basement gyms larger and more versatile than the members-only heavy objects storage locker down the street. In many cases they have a formalized Team Them: specialized personal trainers, massage therapists, psychotherapists, nutritionists, physicians; this in addition to the informal Team many people just stumble into anyway, and possibly the unwanted groupie Team that can also tarnish the previous group's appearance of sincerity. Well, it's not all fun.

They don't all start there, of course. A chosen few demonstrate raw talent and resolve at exactly the place and time when the right person happens to be watching, and they are recruited into the next step higher, and so forth. This is what climbing the economic (and therefore social) ladder consists of. But then you have the individuals who begin their rigorous training as children, who thanks to a steady diet of nutrient-rich edibles have assimilated more physical matter into themselves than their would-be colleagues by any milestone age range, and if the admittedly questionable reports of news media and fad magazines were believed, this skew would appear to be increasing with time.

Edit to add: Is my memory faulty, or was it not always the case that food companies would go out of their way to loudly emblazon the number of protein-grams per double-serving of product on colorful package emblems?

This is very slightly less true of education, and therefore it is far harder for some people to see. In many states in the US, school districts accrue their tax-based revenues and budgets separately—Portland schools get Portland tax money, Sherwood schools get Sherwood tax money, and Tualatin schools get Tualatin tax money. Not so surprising, then, that Tualatin's school district, though relatively richer and capable of offering more supplementary and enrichment programs than my own thoroughly bankrupt school had access to, is nonetheless far behind the other two by all available metrics of achievement. Standardized testing is overall a terrible idea, but it is at least accurate enough to simulate the fulfillment of a fairly obvious prophecy.

Edit to add: As I recall, about a year ago the city of Sherwood received some manner of commendation for being a great place to live. This is unsurprising, because Sherwood is to Oregon as Scottsdale is to Arizona. It is there that the Wealthy have elected to plant themselves, and the Not-Wealthy are found more or less as welcome as a termite colony. Yes, if you live in Sherwood, you will have a good life, but that is because to be able to live in Sherwood is to already have a good life.

Environmental stresses (Being Poor, for example) and under-educated or absent/truant guardians are also most definitely A Thing, but my intention is primarily to rant, not to prove a case no honest or compassionate individual would care to argue against: I shall simply add that this is at least as true within the even less scrutinized realm of the Professional Workplace, and people who insist on forwarding along urban myths wherein a peasant's wage is enough to corner the fruit market and scalp passerby like a protagonist in a tiresome RPG are making themselves part of The Problem.

[reboot]

Dear animals,

Tin cans do not always involve you. Sometimes they are ours. Unless you really want tomato paste. Now get out from underfoot.

Sincerely,

The humans

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