Re: Rants

by **reboot** Tue Jan 13, 2015 3:50 pm

The Wisp wrote:I'm all for giving immigrants but if they have a heavy accent and/don't speak much English please don't put then in a job where they onteract with customers. I always have trouble understanding them, and then I feel like the bad guy for not understanding them.

OK, Wisp. This comment kind of irked me but I do not want to say what I am thinking without context. What was the job the person was in and what sort of business?

by The Wisp Tue Jan 13, 2015 3:56 pm

reboot wrote:
The Wisp wrote:I'm all for giving immigrants but if they have a heavy accent and/don't speak much English please don't put then in a job where they onteract with customers. I always have trouble understanding them, and then I feel like the bad guy for not understanding them.

OK, Wisp. This comment kind of irked me but I do not want to say what I am thinking without context. What was the job the person was in and what sort of business?

This was at the college. She worked at the food station and I ordered something and she mumbled a question that I didn't understand, so I guessed and said no (I thought she was asking of I wanted anything else), so she added a little extra food and mumbled the question again, and again I assumed she was asking if I wanted anymore and I said no, and she added a little more food and gave me the food and looked pissed off.

by **eselle28** Tue Jan 13, 2015 4:04 pm

<mod>Wisp, I realize this is the Rants section, but some comments aren't appropriate even as rants. Take another look at the guideline about attacking groups. This isn't in the spirit of it.</mod>

In a non-mod capacity, I'll add that you seem to very much, and I think rather rightfully, want people to extend a little consideration and compassion regarding your social anxiety when interacting with you because it's something over which you have limited control. I think it's worth considering how that general principle may apply when you communicate with others. I don' t think you would want to be kept away from others simply because it required them to make more effort to talk to you and might make them feel bad if they struggled.

by **reboot** Tue Jan 13, 2015 4:20 pm

Eselle beat me to it. A little compassion is in order.

EDIT: For future reference, if you cannot hear what someone said, ask them to speak a little louder, rather than just answering what you think you heard as you did in this situation. A simple, "I am so sorry, I did not hear what you said, could you repeat it?" would do the trick. If you are shaky in a language, you tend to speak more quietly because you are embarrassed and feel awkward. Being asked to speak up is scary, so you tend to slow down and enunciate. Also, when someone keeps giving an answer that seems to match what you asked, it is hard to know that they did not understand you unless they indicate it.

by Conreezy Tue Jan 13, 2015 8:47 pm

PA school letter came in. Rejection. Didn't have a good feeling about that one to begin with, though.

by **reboot** Wed Jan 14, 2015 11:46 am

"You look so good without makeup", "I wish more women were like you and did not wear makeup", " You are so brave to go without makeup at your age", etc.

O_o

Are you people on crack? I AM wearing makeup. Tinted moisturizer, foundation powder, blush, eye shadow (3-4 shades), lip gloss, and mascara. I am just good at the natural look makeup. On what planet do blondes have black eyelashes and people have slightly shimmery eyelids?

by **Werel** Wed Jan 14, 2015 7:13 pm

reboot wrote:"You are so brave to go without makeup at your age"

HULK SMASHHHHH

Sorry bout the Obliviousness + Gross Messages About Women's Faces Combo Pack, reboot.

by **Werel** Wed Jan 14, 2015 8:28 pm

Things you don't want to read when you finally find an affordable apartment listing: "Please call to set up a time to view. There is no electricity in unit so before sunset would be a good time."

by Guest Thu Jan 15, 2015 4:54 pm

I've thought about suicide every day for more than eight years. This day is no different.

by **reboot** Thu Jan 15, 2015 5:48 pm

Pagliacci wrote:I've thought about suicide every day for more than eight years. This day is no different.

MOD

Pagliacci,
This forum is not equipped to handle people who are feeling suicidal, but we want to encourage you to reach for assistance from qualified professionals so that you can be safe. You can find a big list of worldwide resources here, including low-cost resources.

This absolutely doesn’t mean we don’t want to hear from you! Once you're safe, let us know how you’re doing. This isn't a ban on talking about suicidal feelings - we’re still here to listen and offer support on coping with the difficult stuff - but if you’re currently in danger, please, get help first and save posting for later.[/quote]

by Guest Thu Jan 15, 2015 6:04 pm

I'm not in danger. There's a difference between having suicidal thoughts (which I do constantly) and having an actual plan (which I haven't in over two years). That distinction is probably hard to understand without actually having experienced it.

Not having a plan doesn't change the fact that the thoughts are always there, though, or how much it hurts. I just needed to express that pain out loud.

by **Enail** Thu Jan 15, 2015 6:47 pm

Thanks for letting us know, Pagliacci. I'm glad you're not in danger now (but of course sorry you're having that pain).

by TheRoux Thu Jan 15, 2015 11:28 pm

I just pushed a bit too far with my lady friend and our night out ended in awkward... and I blame myself so hard... I wish I had the Dagger of Time...

by Guest Thu Jan 15, 2015 11:46 pm

Argh, my mind is trying to blow simple things out of proportion again. Not good, not good.

You were asked out to a catch-up lunch after not seeing her for a year.

You're Dad commenting one time that she is into you doesn't mean shit.

Calm the fuck down, you're going to lunch not going on a damn date.

by Gentleman Johnny Fri Jan 16, 2015 5:50 pm

I. . .I think I have something in my eye.
http://www.itinthed.com/16328/what-taking-my-daughter-to-a-comic-book-store-taught-me/

by **eselle28** Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:05 pm

Gentleman Johnny wrote:I. . .I think I have something in my eye.
http://www.itinthed.com/16328/what-taking-my-daughter-to-a-comic-book-store-taught-me/

by **reboot** Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:06 pm

Gentleman Johnny wrote:I. . .I think I have something in my eye.
http://www.itinthed.com/16328/what-taking-my-daughter-to-a-comic-book-store-taught-me/

Oh Yea gods and physics. This reminds me of the time my niece and her friends dressed up in my SIL's lingerie because they wanted to play superheroes and that is what girl superheroes wear :/

She was 5-6

by Guest Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:31 pm

Gentleman Johnny wrote:I. . .I think I have something in my eye.
http://www.itinthed.com/16328/what-taking-my-daughter-to-a-comic-book-store-taught-me/

Good article. Nice to see people jumping in with some solid suggestions as alternatives, because in the long run those series will need people to support them and prove they are in demand. Because they bloody well are.

On a personal note, my mum was sent to hospital yesterday. Then came back after I went to bed. Then, by the time I woke up, had been rushed back to hospital already. Now I'm sitting at work a mental mess. Hooray.

by **Werel** Fri Jan 16, 2015 8:18 pm

Lord, I'm sorry, MapWater. Best wishes to your mom and family, and to you.

by Guest Fri Jan 16, 2015 8:58 pm

Thanks, Werel.

Suspected stomach ulcers, apparently. Honestly sounds like she's bored more than anything right now, but she has yet to see doctors. I'm just annoyed I can't see her until after work.

by Guest Fri Jan 16, 2015 9:02 pm

My sympathies, Map Sad

Hoping the hours go by fast!

by The Wisp Sat Jan 17, 2015 12:22 am

Sorry that's happening Map, I hope your mom is okay.

On the more personal and petty front, I swallowed an underchewed hard candy a few hours ago and I think it scratched my throat. Swallowing hurts. Oh well, last time this happened it felt much better after some sleep.

by Guest Sat Jan 17, 2015 9:41 am

Thanks, Autumn and Wisp. It's really appreciated.

My mum's in hospital until, at least, Monday. Maybe Tuesday. Taking the latter of work just in case (my shift cycle gives me Sunday / Monday off anyway).

I feel really powerless. I hate this feeling. As a control freak, it must be amplified somehow because I can't concentrate on anything. I know she'll be fine - the issue isn't that big of a deal. But I'm a worrywart and the type to freak out over the stupidest of things.

by **reboot** Sat Jan 17, 2015 11:49 am

MapWater wrote:Thanks, Autumn and Wisp. It's really appreciated.

My mum's in hospital until, at least, Monday. Maybe Tuesday. Taking the latter of work just in case (my shift cycle gives me Sunday / Monday off anyway).

I feel really powerless. I hate this feeling. As a control freak, it must be amplified somehow because I can't concentrate on anything. I know she'll be fine - the issue isn't that big of a deal. But I'm a worrywart and the type to freak out over the stupidest of things.

Family health issues are the worst stress because you feel helpless and useless. Sending thoughts your way, Mapwater.

by Gman Sat Jan 17, 2015 1:37 pm

[ltr]Well, I decided to put this in the rants category because I just feel like dumping my thoughts and emotions here, maybe in the aftermath of it all I will see things more clearly.[/ltr]
[ltr]Last night, I went as usual to my dance studio that is outside of my city, but this time was a bit different. [/ltr]

[ltr]Firstly, I picked up for the ride a wide variety of people, one of them was an American visiting my country that 2 of his friends turned hills and mountains to find someone willing enough to help him make it to the studio – so I decided to help. I also picked up another acquaintance of mine (who is responsible for creating a small but dedicated dance scene in my city) and two other girls that needed a ride (one I knew from before in the local dance scene and the other I didn't – for the story's sake, let's call the one I knew from before "Sarah" and the one I didn't "Jane").[/ltr]

[ltr]The night itself, at least from my point of view, was pretty awesome. It was a really enjoyable night. I had some very awesome dances, I was feeling pretty confident in general – that I even threw caution to the wind and managed to ask for a number from a girl that I danced with that caught my eye. Didn't really expect much from doing that – obviously got rejected ("you seem like a really sweet guy, but I can't do so right now. Maybe sometime down the road"). As always when I have a good time at the dance studio, I start getting more emotionally vulnerable in general and things like that can rarely happen. In short - I simply had a blast. Heck, I even managed to dance with Sarah a bit and just started to randomly develop this small crush on her.[/ltr]

[ltr]But later on the way back in the car (it was just me, Jane and Sarah – the other two stayed at the dance studio), the girls had different stories to tell. They both told me that while they did have fun, it was limited in scope. The described that there were a lot of men who tried to dance aggressively, got waaaayyy to close to their personal space, didn't know how to lead at all and that it seems to them that many of them were there to just "pickup girls" and that once they saw that it wasn't working, left the dance floor rather quickly.[/ltr]

[ltr]This made me feel, in an extremely irrational way, ashamed. I was ashamed that this is what their experience was and how it was contrasted to mine. I was ashamed for men as a gender that this is a common experience for women. I felt that I have failed somehow, as that on the way there I described how I like that place and how fun it is to dance there and that people are mostly friendly – and that wasn't the case at all, at least to these two. I wanted them to have fun – and it makes me feel bad that I had a TON of fun and they didn't, even if the reasons for that are completely out of my control.[/ltr]

[ltr]And I am also confused as to what to do with my new felt crush feelings for Sarah.[/ltr]

[ltr]When I picked up my acquaintance friend from before (he was the first in the car) and told him I'm picking up Sarah, he told me blatantly – "wow, that girl is being chased by almost every man from our local dance scene, it's unbelievable." Also…… I did go on one date with another good friend of hers that also makes it to the local dance scene (but that didn't go anywhere and I got a LJBF text shortly after that date). So I feel like its not likely that anything will happen between me and Sarah – because A - the competition is high and B - the fact that I recently dated her friend…. So I guess that hitting on her will just make me look like someone who is looking to just "bang and throw away" and not someone who is respectful.[/ltr]

[ltr]So I'm just kind of an emotional mess, which is made up of a combination of joy, happiness, sadness, and a bundle of anxieties and confusion. [/ltr]

[ltr]P.S. Can someone explain to me why, when I use "Word" to write my posts and check spelling, when pasting the text here, there are these ltr boxes everywhere? confused

[/ltr]

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