Re: Glides' Latest Spectacular Fuckup

[Caffeinated]

I really want to stop hating myself, I want to be good, I want to feel worthy of being loved and desired if that ever happens. I want to wake up one morning and not feel like complete hell.

This is very understandable, and a good goal to have. Sadly it's not going to happen overnight and it will require some work.

Maybe it will soon be possible to feel better overnight (but still need to do important work to fix the ongoing problems.) Drug companies are researching using Ketamine for depression, so far the results seem pretty amazing. http://www.nature.com/news/rave-drug-holds-promise-for-treating-depression-fast-1.16664

Ketamine, a psychoactive ‘party drug’ better known as Special K, has pharma­ceutical companies riding high. Used clinically as an anaesthetic in animals and humans, it has proved an extremely effective treatment for depression, bipolar disorder and suicidal behaviour.

It also works incredibly fast. Unlike conventional antidepressants, which generally take weeks to start working, ketamine lifts depression in as little as two hours. “It blew the doors off what we thought we knew about depression treatment,” says psychiatrist James Murrough at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York City.

Companies are racing to develop patentable forms of the drug, and researchers are battling to understand how it affects the brain. An increasing number of clinicians are prescribing ketamine off-label for their patients, even as some of their colleagues worry that too little is known about its long-term effects.

Glides: You are worth saving. But it'll take a lot of work to change your life into something that no longer reinforces your unhappiness. And work like that takes a lot of energy. Meanwhile, if you're waking up feeling like complete hell every day, that is sapping your energy. My deepest recommendation is meds. If you're not on something, get on something, and if you are on something, get on something better/a better dosage.

My analogy here would be that you're in deep, deep water, and spending nearly all your energy just keeping your face above the next wave and not drowning. Meanwhile, lots of people who want you to succeed are giving you great tips on raft-building and proper paddling technique. But how are you supposed to build a raft if all you can do is tread water? If you could just have a life preserver to help keep you floating, you'd have something left to work on the longer term raft solution.